Wow. Just...wow.

This article is from my favorite new website, Consumerist.com:

"The Harvard Crimson ran a story last week about a student who was asked to leave the premises for writing down the prices of six textbooks at the Coop, Harvard's bookstore of record. The bookstore's president says that there's no official policy against students writing down information, but "we discourage people who are taking down a lot of notes." But what's more surprising, he tells the Crimson that the textbooks' ISBNs—which can be used to look up the same books online—are "the Coop's intellectual property."
The Crimson speculates that the Coop may be reacting this way because of Crimsonreading.org, an online database that lets students search for the lowest prices by using ISBN. Harvard's Undergraduate Council President says he's spoken with an intellectual property lawyer and confirms that the ISBN-ownership claim is hogwash.
We understand taking severe measures to protect your business against cost-cutting competitors—especially when they have a business model that potentially gives them the upper hand against your traditional brick-and-mortar establishment. But we think it's pretty hilarious to invent copyright law. And we wonder, do they own the ISBNs of all books, or just the ones in their inventory? Does the publisher have any ISBN ownership rights? Maybe we should create some sort of international, standardized book numbering system so we can replace this proprietary one.
Anyway, so yeah, don't use ISBNs without writing to the Coop first and asking for permission.
"Coop Discourages Notetaking in Bookstore" [The Harvard Crimson, submitted by Joe—thanks, Joe!)"

In case anyone doesn't know, the ISBN is the "International Standardized Book Number" which is unique to a particular edition of a book--even between paperbacks and hardcover. If you search by ISBN you will get exactly what you need, even if there are multiple titles with the same name.

This is wrong on many levels. And just silly, really. I don't have much to say about it, but as a librarian I am appalled that a bookstore would make a claim like that. Intellectual property? How is an international standardized number their property? It is public information available to everyone; there is no way you could call that a 'trade secret' protected under intellectual property laws.

If the ISBNs belong to that Harvard bookstore, aren't they angry that all the other bookstores are using their ISBNs?

I'll be curious to see if this goes any further.

Amelie

Remember in the movie Amelie when the narrator is introducing the characters, how every character is defined by an idiosyncratic list of things they like or dislike? The narrator would tell you what the thing was and you would see a slightly humorous depiction of the character's reaction to that thing.

If I were in that movies, the things I like would have been:

--standing outside on a windy day
--snuggling into warm sheets from the dryer
--organizing a closet

My dislikes would be:

--being around people wearing strong perfume or cologne.
--any kind of unidentified rattle or noise in a moving vehicle (not from the vehicle, although that is alarming, but rather something in the car making noise).
--when people (coworkers) won't stop talking to me when I am clearly feeling non-conversational.


Amelie's mother disliked, among other things, the pillow-creases that you get on your face while you are sleeping (unless you're a no-good back sleeper (sorry, I'm just bitter because I can't sleep on my back, a fact which creates pain in my life)).

Point of the story:

Last night was the midnight premiere of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, which meant I didn't really get to sleep until after three. I woke up swearing at 7:52 (I work at eight) with the mother of all pillow creases stretching vertically across my face.

That damn crease stayed on my face until 11 am.

Now is the part where I bring everything together and end with a pithy or clever comment, but between my red eyes and constant yawning, this is all I've got until after that pillow gets a second chance at my face.

Why I hate Roman Numerals

or, "Roman Numerals Do Not Automatically Make You Seem Smarter."

Dear publishers of newsletters, magazines, journals, and newspapers (I'm looking at YOU, newsletters),

I realize that publishing a periodical can be difficult. It's hard to keep track of all those numbers, and to remember what volume you last sent out. It's perfectly fine to say that you publish twelve times per year when in fact you publish 7, or 2 or whenever you feel like publishing. I can deal with that.

I understand that sometimes you may decide to change the title of your publication without warning, so that I don't recognize it when it comes. I understand that. I even understand it when, after some indeterminate amount of time, you inexplicably change the title again-- revert to the original or perhaps to something else entirely. I don't mind. Really, I don't.

I understand when you get behind, and your fall 2005 issue isn't published until June 2007. I mean, I personally think it would make more sense to just give up on 2006 entirely and get back on schedule. But hey, it's your prerogative.

It would be nice if you would try and be consistent with things. When you switch back and forth between seasons and months it just makes things so messy. I am a perfectionist though, so maybe that's just me.

There is one thing I don't understand, however, and it is this:

Why, oh WHY do you insist on using Roman Numerals when you have NO CONCEPT of how they work?

This may come as a surprise, but it doesn't make you seem smarter when you're using them incorrectly. Let's look at you for example, CN News. You are on your 93rd volume. Clearly, you are an important organization that has been around for a long time--Good for you! Do you think that your publication is made more, or less respectable when you write the number 93 as LXXXVVIII?

(that's 50+10+10+10+5+5+1+1+1. It's the two fives that really get me).

I know, I know. It does look impressive to see all those numbers stretched out across the page. But if you know anything about roman numerals? Not so impressive. 93 is XCIII (That's 100-10+1+1+1). I'll let you in on a little secret, "When you make up your own roman numerals, people laugh at you."

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but please please go to Google and type "roman numeral converter." It is SO EASY.

Pleadingly yours,

The Chocolate Milk Girl.

We Shall Overcome

Ha ha! I have finally conquered Blogger whilst managing to keep all my secret identities separate!

I'm rather embarrassed at how long it's taken me, but I blame grad school mostly. That and getting a real job in which I do not spend the entire day entertaining myself on the internet to stave off utter boredom. That and not feeling like blogging anymore. That and not having internet at my little* apartment.

I warn you, my return may only be temporary, as none of the conditions mentioned above have really changed.

Also, I discovered a post I wrote back in October, but for some reason never made public. It's a rather passionate essy I wrote entitled, "Why I Hate Dreaming." I've added it below, for your reading pleasure.

*Little, in this case, is not merely an adjective used as a term of endearment. My apartment, while not a studio, would cause claustrophobia in many people. I do love it though. And did I mention I live alone? Bliss, utter bliss.

Newbery Award Reader

Ok, because I'm not in school for the next two months, I have decided to begin my newest reading plan. Actually, it's my first reading plan because I've never read anything from a list before. I mean, I may have read a book from a list but I've never set out to read an entire list. Mostly when it comes to reading lists I just use them as a satisfying source of crossing things off and feeling superior. I read a lot peeps, I'm telling you.

Well imagine my horror when I looked at the Newbery Award list, and I've only read about 20% of the books! Me! Who wants to get a job recommending books to kids! Inexcusable. And not that great of a turnout for someone who claims to love YA books most of all.

So the Newbery Award has been around since 1922. That's um...*mental math*....um, still mental mathing...86 books. Give or take one. I also plan on reading all the Newbery Honor books, but I think I'll start with just the winners. And then there's the Printz Award, which is specifically for YA. The Printz has only been around since 2000 though, so I should be able to knock all those off pretty easily.

In theory, I will be commenting on these briefly as I read them. I think it will be really interesting to look at the winners through time.

(The books in pinky red are ones I have read. The ones in blue are ones that I suspect I have read, but won't know for sure until I start to read them again). I think I'll begin way back when, in 1922.

Read on. (My comments on the books as I read them are here).

Association for Library Service to Children
Newbery Medal Winners, 1922 – Present:
2007: The Higher Power of Lucky by Susan Patron, illus. by Matt Phelan
(Simon & Schuster/Richard Jackson)
2006: Criss Cross by Lynne Rae Perkins (Greenwillow
Books/HarperCollins)
2005: Kira-Kira by Cynthia Kadohata (Atheneum Books for Young
Readers/Simon & Schuster)
2004: The Tale of Despereaux: Being the Story of a Mouse, a
Princess, Some Soup, and a Spool of Thread by Kate
DiCamillo (Candlewick Press)
2003: Crispin: The Cross of Lead by Avi (Hyperion Books for Children)
2002: A Single Shard by Linda Sue Park(Clarion Books/Houghton Mifflin)
2001: A Year Down Yonder by Richard Peck (Dial)
2000: Bud, Not Buddy by Christopher Paul Curtis (Delacorte)
1999: Holes by Louis Sachar (Frances Foster)
1998: Out of the Dust by Karen Hesse (Scholastic)
1997: The View from Saturday by E.L. Konigsburg (Jean Karl/Atheneum)
1996: The Midwife's Apprentice by Karen Cushman (Clarion)
1995: Walk Two Moons by Sharon Creech (HarperCollins)
1994: The Giver by Lois Lowry(Houghton)
1993: Missing May by Cynthia Rylant (Jackson/Orchard)
1992: Shiloh by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor (Atheneum)
1991: Maniac Magee by Jerry Spinelli (Little, Brown)
1990: Number the Stars by Lois Lowry (Houghton)
1989: Joyful Noise: Poems for Two Voices by Paul Fleischman (Harper)
1988: Lincoln: A Photobiography by Russell Freedman (Clarion)
1987: The Whipping Boy by Sid Fleischman (Greenwillow)
1986: Sarah, Plain and Tall by Patricia MacLachlan (Harper)
1985: The Hero and the Crown by Robin McKinley (Greenwillow)
1984: Dear Mr. Henshaw by Beverly Cleary (Morrow)
1983: Dicey's Song by Cynthia Voigt (Atheneum)
1982: A Visit to William Blake's Inn: Poems for Innocent and
Experienced Travelers by Nancy Willard(Harcourt)
1981: Jacob Have I Loved by Katherine Paterson (Crowell)
1980: A Gathering of Days: A New England Girl's Journal, 1830-1832
by Joan W. Blos (Scribner)
1979: The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin (Dutton)
1978: Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson (Crowell)
1977: Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry by Mildred D. Taylor (Dial)
1976: The Grey King by Susan Cooper (McElderry/Atheneum)
1975: M. C. Higgins, the Great by Virginia Hamilton (Macmillan)
1974: The Slave Dancer by Paula Fox (Bradbury)
1973: Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George (Harper)
1972: Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH by Robert C. O'Brien (Atheneum)
1971: Summer of the Swans by Betsy Byars (Viking)
1970: Sounder by William H. Armstrong (Harper)
1969: The High King by Lloyd Alexander (Holt)
1968: From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler by E.L.
Konigsburg (Atheneum)
1967: Up a Road Slowly by Irene Hunt (Follett)
1966: I, Juan de Pareja by Elizabeth Borton de Trevino (Farrar)
1965: Shadow of a Bull by Maia Wojciechowska (Atheneum)
1964: It's Like This, Cat by Emily Neville (Harper)
1963: A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle (Farrar)
1962: The Bronze Bow by Elizabeth George Speare (Houghton)
1961: Island of the Blue Dolphins by Scott O'Dell (Houghton)
1960: Onion John by Joseph Krumgold (Crowell)
1959: The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare
(Houghton)
1958: Rifles for Watie by Harold Keith (Crowell)
1957: Miracles on Maple Hill by Virginia Sorenson (Harcourt)
1956: Carry On, Mr. Bowditch by Jean Lee Latham (Houghton)
1955: The Wheel on the School by Meindert DeJong (Harper)
1954: ...And Now Miguel by Joseph Krumgold (Crowell)
1953: Secret of the Andes by Ann Nolan Clark (Viking)
1952: Ginger Pye by Eleanor Estes (Harcourt)
1951: Amos Fortune, Free Man by Elizabeth Yates (Dutton)
1950: The Door in the Wall by Marguerite de Angeli (Doubleday)
1949: King of the Wind by Marguerite Henry (Rand McNally)
1948: The Twenty-One Balloons by William Pène du Bois (Viking)
1947: Miss Hickory by Carolyn Sherwin Bailey (Viking)
1946: Strawberry Girl by Lois Lenski (Lippincott)
1945: Rabbit Hill by Robert Lawson (Viking)
1944: Johnny Tremain by Esther Forbes (Houghton)
1943: Adam of the Road by Elizabeth Janet Gray (Viking)
1942: The Matchlock Gun by Walter Edmonds (Dodd)
1941: Call It Courage by Armstrong Sperry (Macmillan)
1940: Daniel Boone by James Daugherty (Viking)
1939: Thimble Summer by Elizabeth Enright (Rinehart)
1938: The White Stag by Kate Seredy (Viking)
1937: Roller Skates by Ruth Sawyer (Viking)
1936: Caddie Woodlawn by Carol Ryrie Brink (Macmillan)
1935: Dobry by Monica Shannon (Viking)
1934: Invincible Louisa: The Story of the Author of Little Women by
Cornelia Meigs (Little, Brown)
1933: Young Fu of the Upper Yangtze by Elizabeth Lewis (Winston)
1932: Waterless Mountain by Laura Adams Armer (Longmans)
1931: The Cat Who Went to Heaven by Elizabeth Coatsworth (Macmillan)
1930: Hitty, Her First Hundred Years by Rachel Field (Macmillan)
1929: The Trumpeter of Krakow by Eric P. Kelly (Macmillan)
1928: Gay Neck, the Story of a Pigeon by Dhan Gopal Mukerji (Dutton)
1927: Smoky, the Cowhorse by Will James (Scribner)
1926: Shen of the Sea by Arthur Bowie Chrisman (Dutton)
1925: Tales from Silver Lands by Charles Finger (Doubleday)
1924: The Dark Frigate by Charles Hawes (Little, Brown)
1923: The Voyages of Doctor Dolittle by Hugh Lofting (Lippincott)
1922: The Story of Mankind by Hendrik Willem van Loon (Liveright)

Strawberry, blackberry, schnozzberry, Newbery

1922: The Story of Mankind
Well, this is getting off to a slow start. The reason? The first book on the list is called "The Story of Mankind." When I ordered it from the library I noticed that it was shelved in the Adult non-fiction section. That seemed ominous. It's very outdated. I imagine that in its day it was quite controversial; 1922 seems early for a kids book teaching evolution to win a prestigious award like the Newbery. I'm slogging through it, but so far I'd say this book is no longer relevant. Way to go, Newbs.

8/15/07
I've read the first four books now, and just finally finished "The Story of Mankind." That was a chore. I can see how it was well-written and very well organized for its time, but it is pretty irrelevant now. Also: pretty boring at any time. The main thing that bothered me was how much the author assumed. He would say, "And the rest of this story is common knowledge," and then he would go on. That's just not ok for a book aimed towards young readers. Blah.

1923: The Voyages of Dr. Dolittle
I was wrong; I hadn't read this book before. I must have read one of the others in the series though (there are about 12). It was pretty good. I didn't love or loathe it. The edition I had was 'edited' in terms of the language and treatment of native peoples, but even so I raised my eyebrows a time or two. I can see the appeal of these books, it was a great adventure and wildly imaginative. The chapters read more as individual stories in sequence than one long story, but that's a good thing for emerging readers. It is very very English though, in terms of language, lifestyle and sensibilities. I think it would be a fun read-aloud story.

1924: The Dark Frigate
Pirates! This is the most piratey pirate tale I've read. There's nothing romanticized about the pirates life here and to be honest, it's a solid PG13 in terms of violence. This book is a really good example of the influence of the Victorian belief that children were merely small adults. There are no themes of childhood, or even young adulthood in this book. It is exciting, action packed, and completely rooted in the adult psyche. I quite enjoyed it.

1925: Tales from Silver Lands
This is an excellent collection of folk/fairy tales. I'm not sure if these are actual folk tales, or if they are literary tales, but either way they are great. As someone who has read loads and loads of fairy tale anthologies (middle school age) it was really refreshing to read these. The stories are set in some Spanish speaking land, (but not Spain) so they are unique to the European tales. As I said, that's very refreshing. As much as I love fairy tales, it gets redundant with the European tales, because every country has variations of the same tales. It was great to read some really new stories.

Dream a Little Dream of Me

Last night I had, like, six million crazy dreams. I hate dreaming. Did you already know that? Anyway, I HATE dreaming. Since I have cultivated this opinion about dreaming, I have found that it makes people very uncomfortable, even angry when I say, "I hate dreaming." It seems to be an opinion that I'm not allowed to have, because any time I say it people try to prove that I can't hate dreaming, or that my opinion is wrong because dreaming is awesome. Maybe for you, but NOT FOR ME.

Reasons I Hate Dreaming.
by: The Chocolate Milk Girl

1. Dreaming, to me, is very uncomfortable. When actively dreaming, I'm tossing and turning and waking up constantly; I become extremely disoriented and have a very difficult time actually waking up. Result: I'm always running late if I have been dreaming, and I'm always extremely tired the next day no matter how long I slept.

2. My dreams suck. I can't tell you the last time I had a pleasant fun crazy dream. My dreams are always weird and unsettling, and I often have nightmares. Usually it's just a bunch of random stuff that I was thinking about the day before put together in some sort of unpleasant context. Because of this I don't really put a whole lot of stock in 'dream interpretation.' My dream interpretation goes like this: Last night I was reading the hobbit; Sam Gamgee was in my dream. Last night I was thinking about chocolate milk; in my dream, the sacrificial babies came from the dairy aisle in the grocery store. Last night I was thinking about my friend whose going away party I feel bad about skipping; in my dream she wouldn't talk to me and I felt bad. Whoa, those are deep, man.

3. In the interest of honesty, I do occasionally have what I call 'adventure dreams' which are not entirely unpleasant. In these dreams I'm usually a spy, war liaison, or adventurer. These dreams are very suspenseful and are often quest dreams. There is always a very pervasive sense of evil that I am fleeing or fighting against. They are usually scary, and involve death. I don't usually count these as 'bad' dreams, because I wake up with a sense of wanting to continue the dream to find out what happens. But really, they're not good dreams and I'd still rather not have them.

4. Real life examples:
a. A plane crashes in the back yard, containing my mother who is calling for me to help her, but I am too scared to help her because the plane might blow up. I wake up crying.
b. A giant dog is force-fed babies, and when the dog can't fit the baby in it's mouth, and man cuts the baby up. I wake up yelling, "You FUCKER."
c. A serial killer (a la Se7en) leaves a series of clues to his latest victim, who I find out was a former boyfriend. It is my fault he is dead because the killer is after me. I realize that the next victim will be my current boyfriend, and wake up bawling my eyes out.
d. (last night's dream) All my friends hate me. I wake up bawling.
I can't wait to go to sleep and have more dreams!

Other people may have insightful, wonderful dreams that make sleeping a meaningful and pleasant experience. That's just wonderful for them. Me? I hate dreaming.

The End

Send this to 10 people or your cat will die.

Speaking of 9/11 and enragement (ok, I know we weren't speaking of either of those things, and for that matter I'm not even sure enragement is a word--even so), last night I got a text message forward.

Ok, first of all let's just pause a moment and let that sink in. A text message forward. Last time I checked, my phone was not a conduit for junk mail. Most people have to pay for their text messages, or are limited in the amount of free ones that they have. So annoying!

Second point of enragement, the message was this:

"In honor of all those who lost their lives on this day, send this message to 10 people and something good will happen to you. "

Wait. Where's the part where we're honoring "those who lost their lives?" Hmm...I must have missed that 'message'. Oh! I get it, it has nothing to do with 9/11. AT ALL. It's just a cheap excuse to justify another stupid chain letter. At least email forwards make an attempt to give you some sort of 'inspiration,' whether it's a cheesy 'true' story, or rhyming poem there's at least some body to the message.

There's no real message or honor involved, so the only reason to forward it is so that you will get something out of it. It's superstitious crap. Nothing good will happen because of this message, and it IN NO WAY honors anyone! Yes, something good will happen to you sometime after you forward the message, but does a day go by when something good doesn't happen if you're looking for it?

I'm disgusted.

I don't really mean to rag on people who've forwarded this message. I'm sure they didn't really think about it, just passed it on and then felt like they did something to remember September 11. But that's the problem.

Is this the best we can do? Wouldn't it be better to not remember at all than to remember in such a cheap, self-serving way? Why do we fill our lives up with cheap, kitschy, substitutes for emotion? Are we that afraid of actually feeling anything real? I don't have time for forwards, I'm busy with real life.

Disgustedly and rantingly yours,
the chocolate milk girl

Jumping Ship

I might be jumping the gun posting this since I haven't given notice yet, but I GOT A NEW JOB!!! Hooray! No more American Awesome Products! I beat out 101 people to get what is the current equivalent of my dream job. I'm proud of myself and so happy I could burst.

That being said, for your mocking pleasure I give you the link to my current employer's website. It's a graphic design nightmare.

www.aopmn.com

Note: I wrote this in June but never published it. Now I don't care because I DON'T WORK THERE ANYMORE!!!! That is a hundred gallons of Chocolate Milk cool.